Understanding is crucial - and in that regard therapy is necessary.
But which therapy and from which source is the crucial question.
And the answer is, the best you can get access to.
There are things that one has to understand to heal.
You can heal if you can direct conscious presence at past experience.
Without identification.
Healing is a word for normal processing.
Normal processing doesn’t normally happen.
The mind creates stories about what happened.
And because of that, even many kinds of therapies - therapies focused on the fixation of finding out what happened in a narrative - are unhealthy.
Because - all stories are coming from a limited mind.
A mind seeing one perspective of a situation cannot see the full situation as it was.
The solution is separating emotion from narrative.
Then separating energy from emotion.
Then allowing that energy to process.
The problem is that there are there are two kinds of memory storage.
The first is intellectual memory. The second is emotional memory.
We store emotional memory deeper than intellectual memory.
So, the person remains unhealed.
The mind revisits the intellectual memory, but is unable to access the emotional memory.
We store unprocessed energy within emotional memory.
The solution is learning how to:
access the emotional memory,
separate it from narrative,
then allow the energy to process for the first time.
Once an energy has processed for the first time, it never returns as a problem again.
All traumatic experiences are our unprocessed energies.
They are only a problem because we have never processed them before.
Which means that there are no “traumatic events”.
There are only processed events and unprocessed events.
Intense events that we processed do not become traumatic.
Meanwhile, casual events that remain unprocessed can be traumatic.
How do you process?
In simple terms, it’s the art of observing a bigger picture, expanding the frame you’re looking at.
It’s an impartial witnessing of the situation - without a narrative - that allows processing to occur.
It’s difficult for the mind to understand how to stop trying to “fix,” “fixate,” “have a fixation with” a problem -
Whereby holding the problem, fixating on the problem, is not allowing it to process.
The art of allowing processing to happen we can compare to love.
The practice of allowing experience to be what it is, and observing it.
From the perspective of a person, the way we experience this processing phenomenon:
The mind creates a greater space around the unprocessed energy.
One experiences a natural compassion and understanding within that space.
One feels this as though the space absorbs the energy and it resolves.
In reality, all that is happening is that we allowed normal processing to occur for the first time.
There is nothing “supernatural” about the process.
There is only difficulty in understanding that this is how our systems process.
For dealing with old energies, one has to learn how to access the memory to release the stored energy inside it. That isn't covered here.
An example for present moment experience:
“Here I am, there’s a feeling here, I don’t like it. I don’t want to feel this way, I don’t want to experience this. I just want this to go away. The feeling is there but it’s in the background. I can’t even reach it. I can’t let it go because I don’t have a function to do that.”
With this, we can enlarge the frame.
While directing the attention to sit with and notice the whole experience -
We can observe the part that’s saying:
“I don’t want to feel this way.”
This expands the frame.
That’s the part that we observe and be with and allow to be as it is.
That’s the part that we fixated the attention upon.
We can also notice that by trying to bring the distant feeling close to deal with it, we’re trying to control it.
Then we can notice that you can allow the feeling to be exactly where it is in the distance. Observing it where it is.
This is why teachers - in nearly every kind of practice - recommend developing the role of the impartial witness.
In a manner of speaking, the impartial witness can hold all experience.
The witness holds experience with the presence that allows all experience to process.
One is when you can’t keep a stable career or home or relationship, can’t trust anyone, feel like you can’t hold on to anything, you don’t belong anywhere, you don’t deserve to have what you want, others deserve a good life but not you.
(For me, I was a kid, trying to do what was impossible. I couldn't stop wetting the bed. I became convinced I was incapable. I'm told that my brother would tell other kids about this and I would get extremely upset.)
Two is not getting your own needs met, not allowing yourself to sense pleasure, super covert self abuse/addictions masquerading as pleasure (but it’s really pain), no matter what you do it's never enough. Something about me is bad.
(For most people.. this is an early sexual trauma, having an encounter and then thinking that something was wrong with them, then trying to "cover up" for the rest of their life.
For me, a bit atypical. I was sexually humiliated by a manipulative friend I trusted. We got drunk, he pressured me into sex with him for what must have been 3 hours. Then when I agreed, he said he was fucking with me. It was a culmination of embarrassment, anger, rage, all of the bullying around that age. Exploiting my own innocence and vulnerability, created within me depths and capacities of resentment and aggression the size of worlds. It makes a hell of a lot of sense now. I forgot it even happened. )
Three is freaking out when things don't go as planned. Trying to control life.
(For me, I ended up the bad guy on the playground. She was teasing me with cooties. I didn't know what to do. I told her to get away from me, that I'd hit her. Some chubby kid came up to protect her like the white knight. I realized for the first time, that meant I wasn't the hero in the story. I never anticipated that scenario, so I didn't know what to do. I felt like I didn't have any choices, like I was stuck. Then I'm sitting alone in class, and I decide, you know what, I'll go solo.)
Four is the false self and having to filter. (For me, this was Christmas Day. I rejected religious conditioning because I knew the truth was that I was perfect the way I was. I felt bad because I felt like I was causing Mom pain, making her upset. I tried to be an adult at that moment. I felt like I had to be someone else. I became depressed and unhappy from that moment on.
Five is hidden unconscious jealousy and envy, resulting in not having true creative gifts expressing, blocked throat, inability to speak.
(For me: I'm 7 years old. I'm too much for people, shining too bright, too much joy. I see beauty, life, the adults don't. I'm not safe. Everyone is talking about superficial knowledge. I feel judged by all of their beliefs, as though their beliefs reject who I am without knowing it. I resolve never, ever, to forget this.. I put on a filter to self-protect, and felt unsafe in sharing up until this year. I had lost some of my creative power.)
Six is when you feel like you’re feeling like you have all these ideas and you must be delusional, your ideas can’t be taken seriously.
In general, with most traumas I've worked with, what usually comes up is the feeling of "stepping on eggshells through the house."
Another shame-based trauma I've seen repeated is an early childhood memory of being told that one's own sexuality was bad.
On The Source of Traumas I had plenty of traumatic things happen to me in my life, so I thought those were the source of my traumas. None of them were. For those, I didn't have to go and solve those. The actual traumas were created the first time I had the experience of those feelings, and then didn't process them. These are often forgotten and sometimes seemingly trivial events.
What is an energetic release session?
We’ll use a comprehensive approach to healing core traumas that recur as emotional triggers - traumas that prevent us from living empowered lives free of fear.
Is this what is offered in therapy?
Modern therapy does not currently have widespread access to this state of the art approach. Some long-term therapy modalities are good for long term growth, others are “lets talk about it”. In contrast, this work is not to talk about problems to magnify them indefinitely.
This approach is to resolve problems so we can get on with our lives and move toward happiness and personal liberation.
I want you to feel and experience freedom and restoration.
What’s my story?
I was a bit sheltered growing up with religious conditioning. Then after my parents split, I felt something split inside me that never quite came together again. I was torn between worlds and they couldn't fit together. I was exposed to a naked sight of a cold reality that seemed to swallow me.
A few experiences of abandonment in my early teens was like Earth, maybe even my actual mind, had shattered into millions of pieces. I fell into a spiral of drugs and poverty throughout my teens, doing anything I could to numb the void and cover up an existential pain, to escape my existence and my increasingly conflicted feelings and thoughts. Really, I felt rejected my whole life.
By 18, I had depression and a lot of anger.
By 20 I was diagnosed with C-PTSD and was told that being a left-handed creative type like I was, years of slipping through the cracks and the pressure of trying to keep up left me this recurring stress.. stress that would repeat every night in my dreams for another decade.
My 20's were spent in increasing panic and anxiety as I started to withdraw from life.
Learning the art of mindfulness started to show me the way out, eventually to superpowered people that could help me out, and much later to the kind of real therapy that can actually resolve issues. Not the kind that you feel better because you talked about your problems.
Now it feels like my life is opening up more and more every day, back to my love of creative pursuits, to me, and there's a real Self-Love here that will be here as long as I'm alive - Really, really, the majority of my suffering was only ever that I was hating and rejecting myself.
Having that "I will never leave you" is like being complete. It is that love I really wanted and it's in a place deep deep within me.
I don't know if you've ever seen someone solder metal surfaces together but I'm reminded of that, like I was fused back as one intact, unbreakable, alive me at my core.
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“My life used to be so painful that I didn’t want to live. I was in so much pain every day that I did not know what happiness or joy or fun was. They were concepts so far away from my reality that I had even forgotten they were possible. It felt like my life was impossible. No matter what I did I could not get away from my hell. My past was always present with me and I could not escape the years of sexual abuse and depression..
My depression made it so that I was in bed most days, and if I wasn’t, I really wanted to be. I wanted nothing to do with the outside world. How could I deal with the outside world when my internal world was a living hell? Every day I would wish I would just die. Either something had to drastically change or I was convinced I would die..
I now feel like a person instead of a shell of a person. I have had so many fantastic moments because this process has allowed me to leave my past where it belongs: in the past. This process has been the light at the end of the tunnel for me, giving me hope to what I thought was a hopeless situation, bringing me back to life.” - Joanna
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“I really like the method of your therapy, and the fact that it gets to the parts of the person that is You, and resolves the situation at its source.”- R
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What's My Background?
A little about me:
I've been working with wellness-based healing modalities for 8 years.
I'm a Certified Insight Mindfulness Teacher.
I've worked through my own core traumas and continue to do shadow work.
I recognize the shared human suffering across human experience.
I'm focused on inspiration and full creative expression.
I use an energetic healing method that clears the old patterns in your life so you can find Self-Love in the ever-present now.
What are the benefits to this approach?
With this approach, once you go through this process once, you will be able to go through it yourself on your own. And, if you wish, you can take others through the process.
Does it work?
Yes. It worked for me and I've personally helped over 40 people with this approach. This is a healing where you recover what you lost.
How does this work?
If your application is approved, we'll book a free 30m discovery Zoom call where we can introduce ourselves, I can explain the process, answer any questions you have, and see if we resonate to work together.
Who is this for? How do I know if we're a good fit?
I resonate with those who are empaths and spiritually sensitive people focused on the good, as well as the trickster/rebel/outcast/black sheep archetype, the 'left-handed' creatives that don't 'fit in'.
Who is this not for?
This may not be for people who are not currently on a journey of self-discovery or self-realization or conscious expansion.
However, the process is objective, meaning it works for everyone.
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